(no subject)

[holly_evolving]

I'm fucking tired, man.

I keep reaching out in the wrong directions, to the wrong people. I need to take a break for a few days, sit and rest and see who comes to me.

It's so overcast I can't see the sun rising. The dachshund who howls like a werewolf is at it again, like every day. Today it sounds like mourning.

Yeah man, I know I've done wrong and it's easy to just write me off as terrible, but trust and believe that you do not know the whole story, and I am not going to chase you down and beg you to listen. I am not going to put it all out there and make myself easy to consume. My heart is bruised enough already; I am not inviting the storm for anyone right now.

Come to me, meet me on my fucking terms. Show me that I'm worth that to you. I've been reaching and waiting and begging and humiliating myself, and I'm out of energy. I've got nothing left.

And probably, when I have rested and gained some back, I will go right back to chasing like a lonely puppy.

But I hope I don't.

Comments

[alphafemale1.livejournal.com]

I get very tired of being judged for relationship choices. I can't say it better than "every side has a story".

My hugs and sympathy to you- it's not easy to make that decision, and it sucks to feel like the bad guy.