(no subject)

I make a lot of noise about my depression and anxiety, my joint pain and stomach troubles, not to elicit special treatment, but to bring it into light that these things are everywhere. Yes, I am suffering as I go about my daily life. I still work full time, I still pay my bills and do housework and pull my own weight. I'm lucky enough that I can. The tradeoff is that I need a lot more rest than I used to, and I miss out on a lot of fun with my friends because I'm so damn tired from just surviving the day.

I'm not going to shut up about what I go through, not ever, not until the people who don't have to go through this understand that we are everywhere. We are all around them. Until there is no one left in the world who says, "You're depressed? I never would have guessed. You don't seem anxious. You don't look sick."

Well I am sick. And so are a lot of other people. We're everywhere, all the time, doing things. And I'll tell you why you don't know:

You have told us to shut up. You have told us to stop complaining and suck it up and we are afraid of being fired and we are tired of our "friends" walking on us and we are tired of our families telling us to stop crying.

I hid my illness for most of my life. I smiled and sucked it up and made other people comfortable. Well, fuck that. It takes a heroic amount of effort for me to function like a normal person, and I won't stop putting that effort in, and I don't want a reward. But you will damn well recognize it. Not just for me. But for everyone around you that has been beaten and frightened into silence.

We are here, and we are sick, and we are sick and tired.